Today we buried my cousin, Edward Leo “Eddie” Fall. It was a beautiful, brilliant, sunny day with temperatures near 80 degrees -- an oddity for February 28, even in Arkansas. Eddie lost a valiant battle with a congenital liver disease, Alpha1. He crossed into Heaven on Sunday evening, February 26. If you didn’t know my cousin Eddie, I wish you could have. He was larger than life, in every respect, and we loved him dearly. Here are some of my most poignant thoughts/memories of my dear cousin, Eddie. The day was October 9, 1999. My mother phoned me from a Little Rock hospital, whispering, “Your dad can’t feel his legs.” Following surgery to repair a hernia in his stomach on Friday, he subsequently suffered a stroke on Saturday while getting dialysis. It did not look good. I told my mother I would be there right away. Once I arrived, I realized the situation was dire. I called Eddie, who was not only my cousin but my surrogate “big brother,” and my dad’s best friend. I gave him the news, and I can’t repeat the word he uttered on the other end, but it was both colorful, and appropriate. He wanted to know what he should do, and I told him just to hang loose and pray… that I would get back to him. I am guessing it was about 5:30 p.m. Janette was away on a business trip in Mexico.
We went in to see my dad, and doctors came out to talk to us and give us their best guess at how to proceed. I sat in that ICU waiting room, feeling my whole world cave in. I knew in my heart that I had seen my dad for the last time, and we had exchanged the love of God, and love for each other. I felt the angels surrounding me. But what I didn’t know was that two of my biggest angels were on the horizon. We needed to get my dad's C-pap, a breathing apparatus for sleep apnea, from my mom's van. Greg offered to retrieve it. When he returned from the parking lot, the massive doors to the waiting area swung open, and in strode Greg, flanked by Natalie and Eddie. Nobody had asked them to come, but they could not have been a more welcome sight.
Why on a day when we honor Eddie would I tell a story about my own father’s death? Because you see, the story of our two families is so entertwined that it is often hard to see where one stops and the other starts.
Eddie was 10 when I was born in 1957, and he probably didn’t pay much attention to me for a few years, but by the time my sister and I were about 3 and 4, we were pretty entertaining, and of course, we thought Eddie was IT! I still recall one snowy day when Eddie and David Rector took us sledding. As we pulled our sleds up 8th Street, wearing our little red corduroy “car coats,” my Grandmother Ramsey admonished us from the front door not to slide down “Thrill Hill,” known to many today as Panther Hill. “Okay,” we said with a wave…pulling down one of the gargantuan icicles from her roof eave to slurp like a giant popsicle. And where did we go? Directly to Thrill Hill, of course! And then, a loose screw or nail on one of the sleds caught on one of our coats and snagged it! Oh, no…there we were, on the hill we weren’t supposed to be on, having the times of our lives, and we had torn our coat! The boys disengaged whichever one of us it was from the sled screw, and we moved on, considering that an omen!
When Ed and Janette married, Suzanne and I were the candle lighters… a job we took very seriously in our yellow dotted-Swiss dresses with smocked bodices. We loved it when they would come home to visit from Arkansas Tech, and then they moved right up the street, and we thought that was GREAT! Later, when Greg and I went to Tech, we had another set of topics for mutual conversation, rehashing classes with “double-E” Hudson, Doc Crawley, Coach Dempsey, and eating those famous, famous Whattaburgers! We laughed about shooting pool at the Bluebonnet in Morrilton, while eating pizza and drinking beer, although I have a feeling Ed made a few more trips there than I did in my college career.
When Natalie and Frank came along, Ed and Janette’s lives became more interwoven with my parents’ lives than ever. They spent many weekends together, eating out, and then shopping -- roaming through Wal-Mart or Penney’s or some other store in Searcy, Conway, or Little Rock. And then there were the wonderful trips to Canton, Texas… dubbed “the world’s biggest flea market.” Going to Canton was an event that we planned for all year. We saved up money. We made reservations for places to stay. We plotted and planned what we would buy and/or look at – purses and perfume and home decorating things and jewelry for the women – tools and gadgets and who-knows-what for the men. We would go on Wednesday or Thursday and stay until Sunday, and it was quite often a semi-annual event that colored every conversation in between… we had to discuss what we bought the LAST time, the things/people we saw, where we ate, etc., while planning the NEXT trip! In between trips to Canton, Mom, Dad, Ed and Janette fished a lot… especially on the White River. My dad would call and say, “We have room for 2 more in the boat!” and sadly, we never did do that with them. But I’ve heard the tales a thousand times, and I feel like I made many of those trips, if only vicariously.
Since we moved back to Heber Springs, we have enjoyed many family get-togethers, ranging from weiner roasts to holiday dinners to impromptu visits. Ed and Janette would drive out to our farm and we’d sit on the front porch and visit, just like people did when I was a kid. Or, Ed would drop in during the afternoon and sit and visit with us in our office. Often I’d make us a pot of coffee, and we’d drink every last drop. He and Greg might wander out to the barn to look at the tractor, especially if Daddy showed up, or they might take a look at a tree or two that Greg was watching for some malady. After Daddy died, Greg and I took our motorhome down to JFK one weekend, fairly soon after we got it. We called all of our family to come for a weiner roast. Some had plans, but Ed and Janette came… bringing a truckload of firewood with them “just in case we needed it.” I made a pot of coffee, and we sat in a bright full moonlight for hours, just talking and laughing and enjoying each other. It was comforting to know that Ed was still there, especially with the loss of Daddy so fresh.
When Natalie and Darrell married, Eddie was so proud. I know he may not have always shown it, but he was. I remember the day of the rehearsal when lunchtime came, and he gathered several of us and said, “Let’s go to Rustic.” There we were, in the middle of a really hectic day, enjoying a wonderful lunch and visit at Rustic, and Eddie was having a ball. He always wanted to make his children happy and do everything he could for them, and I think he did a great job in all respects. More importantly, he and Janette provided a loving, sound environment for their children, and they have two wonderful, mature, well-rounded individuals to show for it. And in today’s world, that might be their greatest accomplishment.
Eddie loved Heber Springs, and he had a mind like a steel trap for dates, who lived where, who worked in what store/business, and so forth. We enjoyed many holiday afternoons looking at old pictures and reminiscing. I never knew the great-grandparents we shared, but I feel like I did, because my family made them come alive again with tales and photos and heartwarming memories… and Eddie was a master at doing this. We must strive to do this same thing for Olivia, so that she always "remembers" her Grand-dad Eddie.
Eddie had a big heart, and he was always doing for others. When someone he knew lost a loved one, he’d put a big ham on the smoker and take it right over. When Tim and Dad died, I can’t remember a time he wasn’t with us for many, many days. He was there to step in and drive for my dad when Tim died and Daddy was so unsteady at the wheel. He was there to tell my grandmother that her only son was gone. He was there to help with anything and everything when Daddy was gone. He was there to listen when I had things on my mind and my heart that troubled me. I just can’t remember a time when Eddie wasn’t there.
I have watched Eddie go from the big strapping teddy bear I knew and adored to a more worn version… sorta like a bear Olivia would carry around until the stuffing starts to break down. The last time he visited me was probably about a year ago, when he showed up one day at our office, and we were thrilled to see him up and about. We enjoyed a few visits with him from time to time at his house, and we would always talk about old times, our favorite westerns and cowboy characters, any good movies we had seen, and of course, in the last year or so, we had to talk about Olivia, the new house, and Franklin’s latest construction projects. Just as one never loses the sentiment for an old worn Teddy bear, the delight of spending time with Ed never faded, either. He gave me so much joy and fun in my lifetime, and I hope that I was a deserving recipient, and that in some small way, I gave back to him just a little.
I know we don’t know what lies ahead for any of us. And I know that it seems that our time on this earth with people like Eddie is far too brief. But I also know that God has a plan, and that His hand has been evident in so many ways through the last few years. I know He gave me a strong, healthy Eddie to help us get through the losses of his grandmother Altha, his dad Leo, my brother Tim, and my dad. I know that He covered Janette in prayers so that she could endure all of the years of doctor visits, test, hospitals, missed work, trips to Memphis, and coping with the stresses of just plain old every day life at the same time. I know He orchestrated the timing, so that Natalie, Darrell and Olivia were settled in their house, Frank was established in his business and his home, and Granny Betty was safely resting in the arms of Jesus.
I know that tomorrow, when we wake up, God will STILL be in control… He will still be orchestrating our lives perfectly. And those we loved so dearly will be surrounding Eddie in heaven and welcoming him to their campfire and a cup of coffee (and maybe a roasted marshmallow!), as they remember the old times and smile down on us as we persevere.
Ephesians 6:13 says “Put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground.” This is a sad day for us, but we must honor the memory of Eddie and all of our loved ones by truly living, secure in God’s promises, making the most of every minute of every day God gives us. Isaiah 40:31 tells us “Those who wait for the Lord, who expect, look for, and hope in Him, shall renew their strength.” It is my prayer that our strength would be renewed today, that we would remember Eddie fondly with laughter, tears, and faith that He is healthy, whole, and truly at peace in Heaven.
